Living with Regret

Living With Regrets

What Regrets Do You Have?

Don’t let the regret of what you didn’t do rob the joy of what you can do

So what’s it like living with regret? I myself have lived with regrets and I’m someone who has travelled extensively since the early 1990’s. Travelling to well over 50 countries around the world. As well as living and worked full time in countries like South Africa, Costa Rica, Australia, Thailand and Portugal. I’ve even met some of the most historical figures of our time. Nelson Mandela, Christian Barnard and Thich Nhat Hanh to name just a couple. Spending many years training as a Buddhist monk. And even spent time as a river guide and overland safari guide across Africa. Worked in a tropical Cloud Forest and learnt 3 languages.

And yet I still had regrets

Now some of you may read all of the above and think I’ve have had an amazing life. And believe me I know I have. I’ve seen opportunity and taken it, where others only see fear I see adventure. But everyone I’ve ever asked this question, is living with regret in some form or other. And there it’s always some similarities.

My regrets are simple and cause me no sleepless nights. I’ve lived a truly extra ordinary life, grabbing life by the horns so to speak. The regrets I have are NOT what I’ve done but always what I haven’t done. And this is an all too common issue.

We regret NOT doing something IN OUR LIFE!

I’ve regretted NOT asking that girl out, NOT spending more time surfing, or NOT visiting airs rock while in Australia. But that was then. Now as I trained as a Buddhist monk and then becoming an accredited NLP teacher I’ve now learnt the tricks needed to live without having Regrets.

So what do you regret in your life?

A GREAT little exercise that helps us stop living with regret. And most Life Coaches use with people who maybe unhappy about how their life turned out, ask this simple question.

Ask yourself this:

Imagine you are on your deathbed and your looking back on your life. What has to happened in your life for you to truly feel like you’ve lived a fantastic and fulfilling existence?

These are the 5 Most common answers to this question. Which one sounds like YOU?

I Wish I Had The Courage To Live A Life True To Myself, Not The Life Others Expected Of Me.

If Only I Hadn’t Worked So Hard.

I Should Of Have Had The Courage To Express My Feelings.

If Only I Had Stayed In Touch With My Friends.

I Wish I Had Let Myself Be Happier.

So what would it take for you to live a fulfilled and happier life? What would it be like learning to have the courage to face your fears head on. Learning NOT to have regrets or missing out on some great opportunities. Visualise what it would be like learning to let go and saying YES more often? How would it be to learn a new skill thar helps you into a more fulfilling career? Or perhaps too feel proud of yourself?

My own experience:

My own personal experience with death and these regrets came when I saw my auntie on her sickbed, when I was 12 years old. I don’t really remember the circumstances why my auntie was dying at home, I just have a very vivid and clear picture in my mind.

The image i have is that of sitting in my aunties bedroom as my mum visited. My mother was chatting while I just sat in a chair. I remember looking at all the tubes and machines see was linked up too and felt rather sad. She told my mum that before she died she just wanted to feel “the sand between her toes and to feel the grass under her feet just one last time”. And as a result this simple phrase has stick in my mind ever since and with an unshakable force.

Wow that hit me hard and I remember thinking that those were such simple joyful and completely free things to want. I honestly believe this is one of the most major reasons I’ve spent virtually my entire life travelling the entire world exploring these FREE and simple things.

So What’s Your Experience of Living with Regret?

Kind and Warmest Regards

Dhamma Tāpasā* (Andrew Hallas)

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